So we’re at communion, the most holy of all church ceremonies, and we’re kneeling before the whatever it is, the naos? Dais? (Edited to Add: OK, I’ve just been informed it is the altar. Silly me.)
Anyway, the pastor is coming down the row handing out the wafers and he’s saying, “The body of Christ for you.” On to the next person, hands wafer, “The body of Christ for you.” And on and on down the row, coming toward me.
And for some reason, this is just how my mind works, I start thinking of the Soup Nazi from “Seinfeld” and I imagine the pastor saying, as he gets to me, “No Christ for you!”
And I do my best not to giggle as he sticks the wafer in my hand.
A few weeks ago, again while taking communion, I knelt down next to my wife and I must have bumped her because she said, “What? I’m not giving you enough room?” So I started elbowing her, playfully, and said, “No. Move over.”
Then we both look up and notice the pastor staring at us.
Not sure why people think church is so boring. I’m always entertained.