Unless you’ve been living in a cave, you’ve by now heard that Miller and Coors (ug) have merged. Miller was the Number 2 brewer in the country while Coors was a measly Number 5.
You’d think then that the Number 2 brewer would have a say in where the headquarters would go. You’d think wrong.
Today, Miller Coors (makes me ill to even type that) announced that their new corporate headquarters would be in Chicago.
How could they do that to us? Miller management has lived in Milwaukee, Wisconsin long enough to know that the city most hated by Milwaukeans and Wisconsinites is Chicago!
The most hated rival of the Milwaukee Brewers is the Chicago Cubs.
The most hated rival of the Green Bay Packers is the Chicago Bears.
The most hated rival of the Milwaukee Bucks is the Chicago Bulls.
If we had professional hockey, we’d hate the Chicago Blackhawks.
But you get the point; we have a history of hating all things Chicago.
For goodness sake, we even have an acronym for our disdain of people from Illinois. We call them FIBs!
How could Miller do this to us? It’s unconscionable.
And sad. Sad, because Milwaukee was once lovingly refered to as the Beer Capital of the World. We had many of America’s major brewers here. Blatz. Pabst. Best. Schlitz. Miller. Gettleman.
Now they’re all gone. Oh, sure, Miller still has its brewery here, but not it’s corporate headquarters. No, that’s moving to Chicago.
Now, all we’re left with are a couple microbreweries, Sprecher and Lakefront, and a couple brewpubs, Water Street Brewery and Milwaukee Ale House. They produce great beer (far better than Miller), but they don’t have the national and international presence that Pabst and Schlitz had in their heydays.
Miller was the final touchstone to our past, the last link to our great legacy as Beer Capital of the World.
I’m sure Frederick Miller, who called Milwaukee home, is rolling over in his grave. Possibly all the old brewmasters are spinning along with him.
Miller Executives, in my eyes, are nothing but FIBs now and because of it, I refuse to reach for genuine, have no intention of living the high life, and will never argue if my beer is great tasting or less filling again. (Without knowing it, your market share just dropped a couple percentage points.)
Maybe, just maybe, now that you’ve shown where your loyalties lie, I’ll finally go try a Budweiser.